The Wedding...

So I went to my ex-girlfriend's wedding the other day, acting against the advice of several friends and against my own comfort level as well. She cheated on me the day before I came back for the summer of 2008, and we broke up a month and a half later (don't ask why it took so long). I've only talked to her once in person since then.

My current girlfriend was asked to be a bridesmaid in this wedding right around when we started dating. She received an invitation, however, that did not specify she could bring a guest, while the other bridesmaids were allowed to do so. I volunteered to go, because sitting at a wedding like that sucks when there's nobody with you. My ex obliged, and after we all sat down for dinner at Mama Stortini's in Kent Station a week before the wedding, I was set to go.

Here's the thing: that part of my life doesn't really affect me anymore. It happened over a year ago, and I now have a wonderful girlfriend who I can't seem to get enough of. Here's the other thing: parts of this experience were awkward as hell.

Driving down to Bothell wasn't so bad. I was resigned to the fact that it would be awkward, even though my girlfriend and I had dinner with my ex and her fiance a week before. As I drove up to the church, I became a bit more nervous when I started to recognize people. I had met a good chunk of the people who would be there, and 13 months isn't quite enough for people to completely forget my place.

The first person I saw when I walked up to the church door was my ex's mother. She looked at me and recognized me after a bit of a double take. We shook hands awkwardly and made some small talk before I walked in. I'm sure she talked to her husband soon after to tell him the news: Brent was there.

I walked into the church and found myself surrounded by a crowd of people, some of whom I knew and some of whom I did not. I saw a friend of the bride's hanging around in the corner. His wife was a bridesmaid also, so I figured I could sit with him. He was nice about it, and I did.

The ceremony was quick, with a few awkward silences caused by the pastor for good measure I suppose. I wandered out of the sanctuary and began to do the one thing I had looked forward to that night: finding my girlfriend. At first when I walked out, I couldn't see her. I can't lie, I freaked out a bit. But then, I saw her beckoning from a side room.

I was so incredibly happy to see her, all awkwardness went out the window. I passed by my ex's father on the way over to my girlfriend and didn't even blink. She looked at me with tired eyes, wearing an interestingly-colored mermaid dress, and gave me the hug and kiss that I had needed for a long time.

Seeing her made everything better, but more awkwardness was definitely to come.

At the reception, the fare was normal. Cheese and crackers and snacks and cake. Meets and greets with the family. And sitting with my girlfriend, something I had wanted to do for a long time. She still says she looked ugly, but I know the truth.

The most awkward point of my night was the receiving line. In the middle of the reception, the wedding party and others connected to it formed a line, and we got to go through and say hello. Why not, I said. I shook hands with various people, and was referred to as "'ol Brent" by my ex's parents. Everybody was perfectly nice to me, until I reached my ex's father.

He was created to be the most awkward person on the planet, living or dead. He shook my hand loosely and nodded his head. His wife, who I have met multiple times, shook my hand and said, "hi, I'm Nancy, I'm the mother." I said hello, and left out the part about her conveniently forgetting who I was.

When I reached my ex and her new husband, I didn't know what to expect. I got a hug from her, and a hug from him. They thanked me for coming, and that was that. I got a piece of cake from my girlfriend who was serving, and returned to my seat. We stayed after, helped clean up, and were on our way.

In the end, this experience taught me a lot about the kind of person you should be looking for. I was so freaking eager to see my girlfriend that I couldn't believe it. In my eyes, this shows me how right things are. To be able to take all that awkwardness away would be an impossible feat for anybody else, but a hug from her made literally everything better.

It amazes me how well the entire experience actually went. Between the crazy dress shopping issues, the ridiculous heat and the awkward silences, who knows how this would've gone. But my girlfriend was there, keeping me company and finding me a seat. Even on her busy night, she made me feel special, and that's the type of person everyone should look for.

So, next time you're on a date, ask yourself: could I possibly stay with this person without wanting to cut their head off? I know what my answer is, but it'd be good to consider yours before looking for anything serious. Take it from me, when you get it right, it's the most amazing thing in the entire world.